I would like to introduce you to someone.  Someone very personal to me, who knows everything about me, and is always ready to give an opinion …that will bring me down.

I’d like you to meet PNC, my Personal Negativity Coach.  PNC is the voice that exists in the back of my head that is always willing to negate my actions, goals and feelings.  PNC takes personal pleasure out of being judgmental, divisive and generally complaining.  PNC is bolstered to greater success when something truly negative does happen - a bad experience at work, negative feedback from a friend, or a car blowing up just as one gets onto the Beltway through Madison. 

In fact, PNC is resilient and ever-ready.  PNC takes paranoia to a new level by getting involved in my daily observation of the world and trying to classify everything - usually to my detriment.  That person talking quietly near you?  Obviously, they are talking about you.  That email you got with the ambigiously professional language?  That means the writer is upset with you and distancing themselves.  Truly, there is no end to the possibilities for PNC in Negativeland (which is also the name of an interesting band.)

Don’t paint me a freak.  I don’t follow PNC’s advice all the time, or even give him much of my attention.  It’s in those moments when I’m feeling low that I can hear the voice a little more clearly.  I’m actually a generally positive person. Many times, my hopeful and energetic nature impedes me from acknowledging the real difficulty of getting around obstacles until later.  Which is why it is always good that I sit with an idea or goal for a while before running ahead on it (as evidence, please take note of the tote of fabric I own, yet I still do not know how to sew and therefore have not completed any of the projects I was so excited to start).  I am generally open to new experiences and don’t let fears stop me from doing things I want to do…or at least initially trying them.

It’s just that when you are having major changes in your life, PNC feels he has a duty to raise his voice and question everything you think, do, say or feel. 

And PNC is not always wrong - which is why it is hard to just discredit him.  For example, I recently came to terms with the fact that I should work more on listening to people.  PNC has been telling me this in ways for years.  But now, I am realizing that what I thought was “listening” was really more like hearing.  That I may listen, but I am not a “good listener.”

And that means listening to PNC too.  Listening to what PNC has to say and connecting that with what feats I harbor about myself, my world, and my choices.  Hearing the inner voice, but not letting it rule me.  In fact, using it to undermine PNC by really making an effort to keep negativity from invading my life.

I know I’m not the only one that has ties with PNC.  PNC is known by others often as their “Inner Critic” and sometimes as “The Mind” if you read the Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle (yes, he does sort of remind me of a deranged elf.  Next question.)

Negativity exists, but dwelling on it can be damaging to yourself.  It’s been shown that negativity is easily absorbed and changes how your brain works.  Happy people are better able to think logically, as cited by Creating Passionate Users’ blog article on “Angry/Negative People Can Be Bad For Your Brain.”  Specifically interesting in this article is the reference to Mirror Neurons.  Mirror Neurons reveal so much potential for the individual that it would be crazy, nay, ludicrous to waste that potential with negativity.

And as proof that negativity affects your brain, and therefore your feelings and decisions, the AP reports that negative political ads actually work.  It causes a lot of philosophical ideas, including free will, into question. Personally, when I see negative ads, it makes me dislike the person putting them on the t.v. more.  Perhaps that classifies me as an independent.